Clarity Chat: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

Clarity Chat: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

Nov 17, 2025 | Podcast: Simple Shifts Forward

Simple Shifts Forward Podcast

Episode 011: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

Do you feel like your phone is dinging and lighting up all day? In this episode, Dana explores how notifications hijack your time and attention — and why it’s not your fault. Learn how those red dots, pings, and alerts are designed to trigger your brain’s reward system, and discover one simple shift that can bring your focus and calm back.

A small system change that creates big mental freedom.

“I finally did it… no more pings, no more dings. And guess what? Turns out, the world didn’t end when I turned off notifications.”

Full Transcript

I sat down to work on our chat for today, and low and behold, my phone notifications started going off. It was not an emergency – it was social media.

A number pops onto the screen and before I even realize it, I’d picked up the phone and my attention was gone — pulled toward that tiny red circle like it’s breaking news.
You know that feeling too.
That little badge, the ping, the buzz — they all shout, “Hey, look at me!” even when you’re right in the middle of something else.
A half an hour later, I realized what I had done. I’d let the phone notifications and social media take over my day.
Here’s the wild thing — I think we both know this…those apps are designed to make you respond.
Every sound, every flash of color, every vibration taps straight into your brain’s reward system.
It’s classic psychology — like Pavlov’s dog hearing the bell and salivating for a food treat.
Only now, we’re the ones being trained.
So let’s break this down.
If you’ve ever fallen into that endless-scroll habit or found yourself checking your phone for no reason, please know — it’s not a lack of willpower.
It’s your brain doing what it was wired to do.
And the app developers and advertisers? They know exactly how to get your attention — and keep it.
For me, Facebook was the big pull of my attention. I’m most comfortable there, in the groups, in the feed and I find myself getting sucked in again and again.
I used to tell myself I was “just checking in,” but what I was really doing was letting those notifications run my day.

And most of the alerts weren’t even important — half the time they were posts from people I didn’t know or groups I’d forgotten I joined. I’m a Gen Xer and didn’t grow up with a phone. How did I even get to this point???
So the other day, I decided to do something simple but kind of brave — I turned them off. The FB notifications! All of them. I really did it. I couldn’t even believe it after I made the big decision.
And wow, that was awkward at first. I had all kinds of feelings coming up about it. “What am I missing?” “What if someone is trying to reach out to me?” “What if I miss a coaching request?” Oh my gosh! I couldn’t believe that was my reaction!

It felt like every few minutes I had to fight the urge to open the app. My thumb hovered over the screen like it had a mind of its own.
I’d open my phone, see nothing new, and still feel the urge to refresh — like muscle memory.
But here’s what surprised me: within a couple of days, the quiet started to feel kinda good.
My focus came back.
I could write, think, even breathe without that constant hum of waiting for something to happen.
And guess what?
The world didn’t fall apart.
The messages were still there — just waiting quietly until I decided to check them.
That’s when it hit me — I’d been reacting instead of choosing.
And that one small change gave me back more time, more calm, and honestly, more creativity than I expected.
So I want to challenge you my friend! Turn off one notification.
Just one.
Pick the app that grabs your attention the most and turn off those notifications. Or if you aren’t into social media – then turn off that ringer for a few minutes.

You could even schedule time in your calendar when you want to check in rather than checking all day long.

Notice what shifts — your focus, your breathing, anxiety triggers, or maybe even your level of patience may increase.
It’s not about cutting yourself off from the world.
It’s about reclaiming your attention from things that don’t deserve it.
As I close our chat for today…Just a friendly reminder to both of us -that app doesn’t have to be in control anymore – You are.
Thanks for tuning in today. I love helping you get unstuck, shift your perspective, and keep your momentum going.

In closing:

As I close our chat for today…Just a friendly reminder to both of us -that app doesn’t have to be in control anymore – You are.
Thanks for tuning in today. I love helping you get unstuck, shift your perspective, and keep your momentum going.

💭 Reflection Prompt:

Turn off one Notification. Just one.

Pick the app that grabs your attention the most and turn off those notifications.

Or if you aren’t into social media – then turn off that ringer for a few minutes.

Your Next Steps

Let’s navigate “what’s next”:

• A new business or career path
• A reinvention after retirement
• A shift in identity, energy, or priorities
Work With Me

Listen to more episodes

• Season 3: Simple Shifts Forward
• Season 2: Master Essential Oils
• Season 1: Organize DIY
More Episodes

Clarity Chat: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

Clarity Chat: When Great is Better Than Perfect (S3E10)

Nov 17, 2025 | Podcast: Simple Shifts Forward

Simple Shifts Forward Podcast

Episode 010: When Great is Better Than Perfect (S3E10)

Clarity Chat: When Great is Better Than Perfect. Chasing perfect may look like high standards, but it often steals time, energy, and even connection. Dana shares personal stories about her husband and daughter that taught her the value of stopping at “great.” Learn how to let go of perfection and apply the 90% rule in your own life.

You’ll learn:
• How perfectionism undermines progress and relationships.
• Why “great” is often better than “perfect”.
• How to save time and energy by applying the 90% rule.

“Perfect isn’t always perfect — sometimes great is actually better.”

Full Transcript

Hi, I’m Dana. Let’s talk about why chasing perfect can hold you back — and how it can even affect relationships.

Perfectionism is something I have wrestled with for years.

I’d redo something not because it wasn’t fine, but because I thought I could do it better.

Here’s a story for you. I’ve been married to my husband for 30 years. When we were newly married, I remember a time when we had guests coming and my sweet husband offered to help me clean the bathroom (I think it was actually my in-laws, which ratcheted up the stress a bit more than usual LOL). He was  working hard at cleaning that bathroom, and instead of being grateful, I waited until he was doing something else, and I redid his work! Because it wasn’t “to my level of perfect.”

Well, as you can imagine, he found out because he caught me in the act. He felt undermined, like his help wasn’t valued. And honestly, he didn’t want to help again.

I thought to myself, this is a good lesson to learn…But then guess what?

Years later, I repeated the pattern with my pre-teen daughter. She was cleaning her bathroom as part of her chores, and I immediately pointed out what she’d missed. Her response? “You do it then.” “Oh man! I did it again!” She felt criticized, and I felt terrible for falling back into that perfectionism trap, and I was disappointed in myself because I thought I had learned that lesson long ago.

The Trap of Perfect: Perfect steals time and connection. It delays progress, drains energy, and creates tension with the people we love.

Why not try using a new standard of Great instead of perfect… “Great” frees you. It saves time, preserves relationships, and lets you move forward.

Try the 90% Rule: if it’s already at 90%, stop. That last 10% usually takes the most energy for the least payoff. And can take down a relationship in seconds.

So, you’re here’s your question for today… Where are you chasing perfect right now? What would “great” look like instead

In closing:

As I say goodbye for today, I want to close with a reminder for us all to aim for great, not perfect. You’ll free your time, protect your energy, and maybe even strengthen your relationships.

Thanks for joining me — I’ll be back soon with another gentle nudge.

💭 Reflection Prompt:

Where are you chasing perfect right now?

What would “great” look like instead?

Your Next Steps

Let’s navigate “what’s next”:

• A new business or career path
• A reinvention after retirement
• A shift in identity, energy, or priorities
Work With Me

Listen to more episodes

• Season 3: Simple Shifts Forward
• Season 2: Master Essential Oils
• Season 1: Organize DIY
More Episodes

Clarity Chat: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

Clarity Chat: Talking Back to the Inner Critic (S3E9)

Nov 17, 2025 | Podcast: Simple Shifts Forward

Simple Shifts Forward Podcast

Episode 09: Talking Back to the Inner Critic (S3E9)

Clarity Chat: Talking Back to the Inner Critic: Your inner critic is sneaky — hiding in phrases like “I should,” “I never,” or “What’s wrong with me?” Dana shares how to name that voice, spot its buzzwords, and reframe its harshness into kinder truths.
You’ll learn:
• How to recognize critic “buzzwords” in yourself and others.
• Why naming your critic takes away its power.
• Simple ways to reframe negative self-talk into supportive language.

“The inner critic in your head is sneaky — often hiding in phrases like “I should,” “I never,” or “What’s wrong with me?” — it’s there even when you don’t notice.”

Full Transcript:

Hi, I’m Dana. Today we are talking about how to spot that inner critic, I’ll give you buzzwords to look for and some fun ways to get your friends involve in keeping that critic at bay.

Lets start with who is this inner critic I’m talking about?

We all have one – its not just you. It’s that little voice in your head that judges, doubts, and points out your flaws — often harsher than anyone else ever would.

It’s not truth, but a mix of old fears, comparisons, and borrowed beliefs that can hold you back if you don’t learn to recognize it.

How to recognize the Inner Critic: How do we recognize it because it doesn’t always shout. Sometimes it slips into everyday phrases:

o “I should…”
o “I always mess this up…”
o “I’ll never get it right.”
o “What’s wrong with me?”
o “Everyone else is better at this.”

So here’s a funny idea: Name your critic — “Negative Nancy,” “The Judge,” “Grumpy Gus.” A silly name takes away its power and makes it easier to talk back.

Another tip for you: It can be hard to notice these words in ourselves. But you know where it’s easier? Hearing them from other people.

I catch these words from family, friends, even on TV shows.

When someone says “I’ll never be good at this” — my ears perk up. Why? Because it’s easier to recognize the critic in others before we hear it in ourselves.

Make critic Pact: make a pact with someone close to you. Ask them to gently point out buzzwords like “should,” “I never,” or “I always” when they hear you say them. And offer to do the same for them.

When you catch those buzzwords…use The Friend Test. Try a redo of your words using softer words that you might use when talking to a friend.

You wouldn’t say “You’re lazy” to someone you love. You’d say, “You’ve had a lot on your plate — rest matters too.”

Here are some other examples:

o Critic says: “You’re so lazy.” → The friend says: “I’m tired. Rest is part of the process.”
o The Critic: “You always mess things up.” → Friend says: “I’m still learning. Mistakes mean I’m growing.”
o The Critic: “You’ll never change.” → Friend says: “Change takes time — I’ve already started.”

Now, I’d like you to think about one thing your inner critic has said lately? And how would you reframe it if you were talking to your daughter, son, or best friend? Practice this trick because, like a muscle, it will get stronger as you use it.

In closing:

So to recap, listen for the buzzwords. When the critic shows up — in your head or in someone else’s — name it, reframe it, and remind yourself: it doesn’t get the final word.

Thanks for sharing this space with me — we’ll meet again soon.

💭 Reflection Prompt:

I’d like you to think about one thing your inner critic has said lately? And how would you reframe it if you were talking to your daughter, son, or best friend?

Practice this trick because, like a muscle, it will get stronger as you use it.

Your Next Steps

Let’s navigate “what’s next”:

• A new business or career path
• A reinvention after retirement
• A shift in identity, energy, or priorities
Work With Me

Listen to more episodes

• Season 3: Simple Shifts Forward
• Season 2: Master Essential Oils
• Season 1: Organize DIY
More Episodes

Clarity Chat: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

Clarity Chat: Forgive Yourself First (S3E8)

Nov 17, 2025 | Podcast: Simple Shifts Forward

Simple Shifts Forward Podcast

Episode 08: The Closet and the Critic (S3E2)

Clarity Chat: Forgive Yourself First. We forgive others all the time, but forgiving ourselves is often hardest. Dana shares a five-minute journaling practice — plus a modern metaphor about clearing your browser history — to help you release guilt and feel lighter.

You’ll learn:
• Why self-forgiveness matters more than perfection.
• How a simple writing practice can quiet the critic.
• What it means to refresh your mindset instead of carrying old mistakes.

“We forgive others all the time, but when it comes to forgiving ourselves? That’s the hardest part.”

Full Transcript

Hi, I’m Dana. Let’s spend a few minutes together today, looking at a simple practice that makes moving forward feel lighter.

When things don’t go right, our inner voice is quick to pile on:

  • “You should’ve done better.”
  • “Why can’t you figure this out?”
  • “Really? Again?”

That self-talk can weigh more than the mistake itself.

Here’s a practice I use: set a timer for five minutes.

Write this sentence again and again:
“I forgive myself for judging myself for…” and then fill in the answer.Examples:

  • “I forgive myself for judging myself for being tired.”
  • “…for snapping at my partner.”
  • “…for leaving the laundry unfolded.”

At first, it feels awkward. But then the critic quiets. The shoulders drop. You breathe easier.
It’s like clearing your browser history. All the old tabs and mistakes running in the background — slowing you down. Forgiveness is refresh. Not erasing, but releasing.

Reflection Prompt: If you were to try this, what’s the very first sentence you’d write?

Forgiveness isn’t excusing. It’s releasing. It’s choosing to stop carrying so much weight.

In closing:

So today, let yourself off the hook. Try the five-minute forgiveness refresh. It won’t make you perfect — but it will make you lighter.
Thanks for sharing this practice with me. I’ll see you in the next talk.

Thanks for spending this moment with me — I’ll see you in the next talk.

💭 Reflection Prompt:

“I forgive myself for judging myself for…”

What’s the very first sentence you’d write?

Sometimes we need to bypass our “thinking brain” with a quick gut instinct. Remember this! Forgiveness isn’t excusing. It’s releasing. It’s choosing to stop carrying so much weight

Your Next Steps

Let’s navigate “what’s next”:

• A new business or career path
• A reinvention after retirement
• A shift in identity, energy, or priorities
Work With Me

Listen to more episodes

• Season 3: Simple Shifts Forward
• Season 2: Master Essential Oils
• Season 1: Organize DIY
More Episodes

Clarity Chat: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

Clarity Chat: Stop Letting Should Weigh You Down (S3E7)

Oct 17, 2025 | Podcast: Simple Shifts Forward

Simple Shifts Forward Podcast

Episode 07: Stop Letting Should Weigh You Down (S3E7)

Clarity Chat: Stop Letting Should Weigh You Down. “Should” sounds small, but over time it can weigh us down like a backpack of bricks. Dana shares how many of our “shoulds” come from family folklore, cultural expectations, or old hand-me-down rules. Learn how to drop the “shoulds” that aren’t yours and replace them with the lighter power of “could.”

You’ll learn:
• Why “should” feels heavy and restrictive.
• Three questions to ask when a “should” shows up
• How swapping “should” for “could” creates freedom and choice

    “Someone, somewhere decided these beliefs were truth — and they became part of our stories.”

    Full Transcript

    Hi, I’m Dana. Let’s talk about the weight of “shoulds” — how they sneak into our lives, and how to replace them with something lighter.

    Family Folklore: Many “shoulds” aren’t even ours. They’re hand-me-down rules and family folklore.

    In my family and from the words of friends, I’ve heard things like:

    “Your aunt always used cloth napkins, so that’s what we do.”
    “Our family’s never been good with money, so don’t expect to be.”
    “We don’t do things that way.”

    Someone, somewhere decided these were truths — and they became part of our stories.

    Why Should is Heavy: Each “should” becomes a brick in your backpack. You end up carrying family rules, cultural norms, and even social media expectations. The problem? You never chose to pack those bricks — but you’re still lugging them around.

    Next time you hear a “should,” ask yourself:

    • Whose voice is this, really?
    • Do I believe it, or did I inherit it?
    • Is this helping me, or just weighing me down?
    • If it’s not your “should,” you don’t have to carry it. You can say, “That may have been their truth, but it doesn’t have to be mine.”

    The Swap: “Should” feels like obligation. “Could” feels like choice. So let’s talk about a way to swap should for could.

    Here’s some examples:

    • “I should make a home-cooked meal” → “I could order pizza and enjoy time together.”
    • “I should be more ambitious” → “I could define ambition in a way that fits me.

    Could” gives you power back.

    Here’s my question for today… What’s one “should” you’ve been carrying? What would happen if you swapped it for “could”?

    In closing:

    So today, drop one “should.” Replace it with “could.” Notice the lightness in that one simple shift.

    Thanks for sharing this space with me — we’ll meet again soon.

    💭 Reflection Prompt:

    Try this today, drop one “should.” Replace it with “could.” Notice the lightness in that one simple shift.

    Your Next Steps

    Let’s navigate “what’s next”:

    • A new business or career path
    • A reinvention after retirement
    • A shift in identity, energy, or priorities
    Work With Me

    Listen to more episodes

    • Season 3: Simple Shifts Forward
    • Season 2: Master Essential Oils
    • Season 1: Organize DIY
    More Episodes

    Clarity Chat: Gain More Time and Improve Your Focus (S3E11)

    Clarity Chat: The Power of Pause (S3E6)

    Oct 16, 2025 | Podcast: Simple Shifts Forward

    Simple Shifts Forward Podcast

    Episode 06: The Power of Pause (S3E6)

    Clarity Chat: The Power of Pausing. Pausing isn’t weakness — it’s wisdom. Dana shares a story about car shopping with her family (and why a sandwich break made all the difference!) to show how slowing down creates clarity, better decisions, and stronger relationships.

    You’ll learn:

    • Why pausing can lead to more aligned decisions
    • Simple ways to create tiny pauses in your day
    • How Human Design reframed Dana’s approach to decision making

    For more encouragement, grab Dana’s free Stuck to Started Reset Kit at www.dana-mitchell.com.

    “Pausing isn’t weakness — it’s wisdom.”

    Full Transcript

    I once believed — and was told by a boss I respected — that quick decisions showed strength.

    “Be decisive. Don’t hesitate.” But living that way left me out of sorts. I wasn’t making better decisions — just faster, more stressed ones.

    Hi, I’m Dana. Let’s talk about why pausing might be the strongest move you can make.
    What I Know Now: is Pausing doesn’t make you weak. It gives your emotions space to settle and your clarity of a decision or situation a chance to focus.

    What a Pause Looks Like: Pauses can be tiny. You can use a pause in a way that works for you and no one else has to know about it.

    • Three deep breaths.
    • Silencing notifications.
    • A 10-minute break for a nap, prayer, or meditation.
    • Not giving an answer right away — even if it’s a question from someone I love.

    Human Design + Car Shopping Story: I have a story for you. I love personality tests! My background has been working in Human Resources for over 30 years so I’ve had many opportunities for self-exploration in the form of learning about what makes people tick and most of all, how I tick. 


    Over the last couple of years, I learned a lot about myself through something called Human Design. If you’ve never heard of it, there are lots of practitioners online.


    One major ah for me has been that I’m an “emotional authority.” It means clarity comes after waiting — not in the heat of the moment. That totally makes sense now, why the pressure to make quick decisions made me feel out of sorts, like I wasn’t listening to my own gut instinct.

    Recently, this really hit home while car shopping with my husband and daughter. The dealer pressured us with the whole “buy now or lose the deal.” I really detest this sales tactic because my family felt urgency, and I felt a whole lot of stress. I had even had a chat with my family about what we would do if this pressure tactic were to be applied.

    Well it started raining.

    It got a little chilly (I live in the South and usually we love a good breeze – but not today).

    So when the dealer started telling us that this vehicle would move fast and he was sure other people would be coming to test drive it any minute…I pushed right back.

    I said, “This momma needs a sandwich.”

    And looking at my daughter went on to say…”Right now.”

    You can image what my teenager said….” Uuuggghhh No aaahhh. What are you doing? Can’t you wait?”

    Well, in fact, No, I could not. I started laughing to myself because I knew…I needed a pause – in a really big way.

    So we left, ate a sandwich, talked calmly about the deal, and when we came back — guess what??

    Miracles of miracles…the car was still there. After our pause..our decision felt solid, and we did make a purchase with no regrets.

    Our question for today…Where could you insert a pause in your own day? Maybe its before hitting “send on an email or text,” during a tough conversation, or even when online shopping?

    Benefits of the Pause:

    • It’s a Reset for stress.
    • Helps us make better decisions.
    • Strengthen relationships by having calmer responses.
    • And protects your energy from overreaction.

    In closing:

    I encourage you to look for opportunities to pause. Try one pause sometime today… even a small one. You’ll see it’s not wasted time. It’s that reset that makes you stronger and more self-confident in your decision-making.

    Thanks for sharing this space with me — we’ll meet again soon.

    💭 Reflection Prompt:

    Where could you insert a pause in your own day? Maybe its before hitting “send on an email or text,” during a tough conversation, or even when online shopping?

    Your Next Steps

    Let’s navigate “what’s next”:

    • A new business or career path
    • A reinvention after retirement
    • A shift in identity, energy, or priorities
    Work With Me

    Listen to more episodes

    • Season 3: Simple Shifts Forward
    • Season 2: Master Essential Oils
    • Season 1: Organize DIY
    More Episodes

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